“You complete me” – A common phrase heard between lovers in films, books and reality. Do two halves really make a whole or is the missing half you’re looking for already within you? To progress as a whole being, we must first marry the feminine and masculine aspects found within all of us.
The roles that gender play on our identities are a popular topic. More and more men, women and trans are breaking the restraints of what is expected of us by society.
As a female, growing up in Australia, I was told constantly to “be more lady-like“. (Blah! – This never sat well with me and I always wanted to rebel!) I was indirectly taught by my family, peers and society that girls aren’t funny or aloud to get grubby, swear or be open and confident with themselves sexually. I was to be passive, quiet, pretty to look at and I will admit I am guilty of having played down my intelligence at times.
It was when I started to listen to this rebel within me and embrace my androgyny that I truly started to discover and be confident with who I am.
In 2016, while becoming more comfortable with my male aspects, I came across a book called “Windhorse Woman: A Marriage of Spirit” by Lynn Andrews. The book is a tale of the lead female character’s own spiritual experience of meeting and unifying with the masculine within herself.
What I have discovered is that we are spiritual beings born into an Earthly human body. Although my physical body has the look and reproductive functions of a woman, the soul is genderless.
“We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience” – Pierre Teilhard De Chardin
On our journey to become “whole”, it is a paramount step to become comfortable with the male and female aspects of ourselves. We are reminded of Yin and Yang (It is everywhere!)
When two whole humans come together, they do not complete each other, but dance through life together. Each person compliments the other, while sharing the roles of masculine and feminine. We soon realise that the pair not only honour themselves but honour each other for who they are, not by the constraints of gender. (It is harder to accept this of someone else when we have not yet accepted it in ourselves!)
It doesn’t matter if you are straight, bi, gay, transgender or a hermaphrodite. Honour your softness and respect your hard edges. Learn to love all aspects of yourself. Everything you are looking for in a mate is already within you! When you stop looking externally and start to look internally, you will shed this false “need” for someone to complete you.
It is when we know what to look for within ourselves that we know what to look for within someone else. That is the moment when two whole people can find each other and dance side by side together through life.
For a deeper understanding of the Yin-Yang and the masculine and feminine, check out my other post Yin-Yang and the Principles of Masculine-Feminine (In a Nut Shell)